That person you’re frustrated with because they are late doing a task, or maybe it’s not as good as it once was, or maybe they just decided to not return your call.
Maybe they never wanted to do it in the first place.
“But they agreed… blah blah blah.”
We all agree to things every day we don’t want to do.
To be nice.
Actually, that’s not it at all.
I believe people often confuse “nice” and “pleasing”. Pleasing often leads to appeasement. And appeasement has been the downfall of many a relationship.
According to ye olde Dictionarydotcom:
Nice – pleasant; agreeable
Pleasing – give satisfaction
Appeasing – pacify or placate (someone) by acceding to their demands
See the difference now?
I believe you are not here to appease anyone, to please only a few (and only if you receive reciprocation), and to at least be nice to most others.
Learn to say NO and avoid the trap.
“But I’m paying them… blah blah blah”
Are you paying them enough? Are you paying them their true value to you? Or did you low-ball them for the “best price” (for you) because you know they desperately wanted/needed the extra work?
Example: I recently referred a friend some work, but first I copied and pasted the guy’s offer to him to see if he was even interested. He said yes, but when I sent the guy to him, the guy said he would be paid half the rate and only for 1/5th of the work that I copied/pasted from his EXACT message to me asking if I knew of anyone.
It was an obvious NO after that.
On my consulting services I have a FAQ that someone asked: “Will you work for a reduced rate?” My reply? “Only if you will accept reduced results”.
It’s the same with pay.
I actually had a career as a VP of Network Technology in a prominent bank. They paid me VERY well. And the benefits and bonuses were crazy. I stayed there for 7 years while I built my own business, even after I was earning more some months from my own business than what I was being (very handsomely) paid per year in my cozy position.
Why? Because they took care of me. VERY well. So I stayed and together with my team we did amazing things for this division of the company, even after they outsourced us. Things that are still in play today – over 11 years later, and adding millions more to their coffers ever month.
Stop taking advantage of people and they will bring you endless loyalty and more value than you can imagine, even if/when they do their own thing on the side.
“But the exposure… blah blah blah”
First, check your ego.
Next, I’ve never seen exposure pay the bills.
Finally, in my experience, people who offer you “the opportunity” to do work free or at a highly discounted rate in exchange for exposure very rarely follow through. They know this from the beginning and it happens regardless of what you deliver to them.
Example: I have a friend right now who someone pulled the “for the exposure” card on him and my friend had already been working with this fella’s mentors YEARS before the “exposure guy” was a twinkle in his field. He already has exposure.
Don’t get sucked into this fantasy unless you get specific details agreed in writing prior to starting the work; then, when they don’t do their part, invoice them mercilessly for the agreed-upon PENALTY of 10x your normal rate.
Never work now for the promise of future reward.
Pros get paid up-front.
Amateurs get paid when the other person decides, if at all.
Why am I sharing this with you?
Heck, I don’t know.
Maybe because of this message I got this morning. And the reminder it gave me of what I bring to the table for SO many people. And helping me remember who the fuck I am.
I remember a time when people used to ask what I do and my answer was,
“I sell hopes and dreams and the belief in oneself to those who are ready to buy”.
It was a hat-tip to one of my mentors, Glenn Turner who, when asked if he as a con man or a saint replied, “I am a con man because I con people into believing in themselves.”
Wherever you are…
Whoever you are…
I believe YOU are your most valuable asset.
I believe YOU have to take care of you.
And, I believe in you more than you believe in yourself.
I know it’s nice to have people in your corner, too.
I have people I trust in my corner.
I believe in you and I will help you look deep inside and find the power in yourself that you have been hiding for far too long.
Want someone to help you make the impossible possible?
Warning: I’m not a “life coach”.
I’m nowhere near qualified to be a life coach because Lord knows my life isn’t anywhere near all sunshine and roses but, that said… parts of my life are absolutely badass…
… and if there’s something you see in my life that I do that you’d like to know how to do for yourself… I can definitely help you chart a path to get there.
Be it business or marketing or outdoors stuff or something else entirely…
I’m a probability enhancer.
Your chances of getting to your desired end result WITH my help is probably much better than your chances of getting there without my help.
Sometimes you will love me. Sometimes you will hate me.
We will laugh and cry together.
Whatever you need…
If you need someone in your corner, I’m right here.
(Except without the tights or cape.)